This is the first time I sooooooooooooooo hate holiday!! =(
Really feel like nothing to do, so lifeless. Everyday eat, sleep, play.... =.='''
Want to work but someone call me to stay home and don't go anyway, what the...........
Hate boring lifestyle!!!!!
Just went to hospital for 4D scan for baby's face on Thursday.
Unfortunately,
we can see baby's face! Coz she is sleeping with her hand covering her face. So sad.
My baby girl just don't want to let us see her. Haha!
Need to wait until end of December and go for 4D scan again~~ =D
However, as she is growing bigger and bigger, I became happier and happier. ^^
Now baby almost 1kg, everything okay, healthy, happy, punching me all the time when she is awake. Haha!
Just can't wait to see her. February faster come please!! XD
Friday, December 9, 2011
Tuesday, September 20, 2011
Once in life time - WEDDING!
After busy for one and a half month, I had my wedding buffet and morning ceremony. ^^
Before this I'm kinda tension because of those prepare wedding stuff. Fortunately, my wedding ceremony go as smooth as the plan.
Thanks to all my sisters and brothers! Love you guys! ♥ ♥ ♥
And thanks to all the sweet wishes too! I'm so happy.
Maybe this wedding doesn't match my dream, my husband doesn't fulfil those prince's criteria( rich, handsome, 5C, etc) , however, as I choose to marry to him, I believe I had made the right choice in my life. He is the one that I want!
I feel so touching when I saw hooi shan, kui lian, ding xian, etc come to my house. Tears almost fall off... :'(
And here is some of the photo on 29th August.
Before this I'm kinda tension because of those prepare wedding stuff. Fortunately, my wedding ceremony go as smooth as the plan.
Thanks to all my sisters and brothers! Love you guys! ♥ ♥ ♥
And thanks to all the sweet wishes too! I'm so happy.
Maybe this wedding doesn't match my dream, my husband doesn't fulfil those prince's criteria( rich, handsome, 5C, etc) , however, as I choose to marry to him, I believe I had made the right choice in my life. He is the one that I want!
I feel so touching when I saw hooi shan, kui lian, ding xian, etc come to my house. Tears almost fall off... :'(
And here is some of the photo on 29th August.
Thursday, May 26, 2011
Cambridge FML
I screwed my chemistry practical exam today. Down ~~~
At first I thought it should be okay for me. I just treat it as normal practical.
But, again, my ASSUMPTION is WRONG!
I had not enough time to complete it. I aimed to get an A for my Chem.
I don't know how to express my feeling. I didn't put much effort in the exam.
Sometimes I feel like want to be hardworking, but it just can't be that.
It is the first time I got the feeling of guilty since I started my school-year long long time ago.
Since I started my A-level, I always felt down, sad, and disappointed.
I don't know why.
Really. Sometimes I feel like I'm not studying for me myself, is just to achieved what my Mums want me to do.
Just to make her happy.
However, mummy I'm sorry. I had to make you disappointed for the first time. Sorry.
I'm here to promise you, I will try my best best best in my A2.
At first I thought it should be okay for me. I just treat it as normal practical.
But, again, my ASSUMPTION is WRONG!
I had not enough time to complete it. I aimed to get an A for my Chem.
I don't know how to express my feeling. I didn't put much effort in the exam.
Sometimes I feel like want to be hardworking, but it just can't be that.
It is the first time I got the feeling of guilty since I started my school-year long long time ago.
Since I started my A-level, I always felt down, sad, and disappointed.
I don't know why.
Really. Sometimes I feel like I'm not studying for me myself, is just to achieved what my Mums want me to do.
Just to make her happy.
However, mummy I'm sorry. I had to make you disappointed for the first time. Sorry.
I'm here to promise you, I will try my best best best in my A2.
Wednesday, May 18, 2011
INSOMNIA
两天了，都睡不着。 很烦。烦他做工的东西，也烦自己的东西。
就是觉得很压力。明明很累却睡不着。
是我要求太高，还是。。。。？
我知道你对我很好，很疼我，可是有时我还是会埋怨。
最近开始觉得我们没像一开始时那么甜蜜了。有些东西，久了，就变了！
一开始，你去哪里做工，睡前，睡醒时，到家，在做什么等等，你都会跟我说。现在呢？
我开始觉得，住在一起，并没想像中那么好。
相处久了，任何事情，都变成一种习惯了。甜蜜不再！平平淡淡。
是祸，抑或是福？！！
感觉失去方向了。。。
我想要的，很简单，就是----回到最初~~~~
当初的甜蜜，当初的快乐，当初的温柔。。。
我不想再争吵了。我很累很累了。
就是觉得很压力。明明很累却睡不着。
是我要求太高，还是。。。。？
我知道你对我很好，很疼我，可是有时我还是会埋怨。
最近开始觉得我们没像一开始时那么甜蜜了。有些东西，久了，就变了！
一开始，你去哪里做工，睡前，睡醒时，到家，在做什么等等，你都会跟我说。现在呢？
我开始觉得，住在一起，并没想像中那么好。
相处久了，任何事情，都变成一种习惯了。甜蜜不再！平平淡淡。
是祸，抑或是福？！！
感觉失去方向了。。。
我想要的，很简单，就是----回到最初~~~~
当初的甜蜜，当初的快乐，当初的温柔。。。
我不想再争吵了。我很累很累了。
Tuesday, April 26, 2011
20th April - One Year
Every year I'll be in the extremely down mood in April. For me, April is not a good month! Sometimes I just struggling whether to let my friends know or not to do so. There are two incidents happened that makes me got melancholia. This is the 2nd. I knew that I can't control my emotions sometimes, or rather, all the time. (Whatever u think it is.) I hate people discuss about the topic of abortion when you don't really know it. Sorry. I just can't understand why did someone want to talk about it when they don't really knew about the situation. I hate people who critics about me. Do you really understand what kind of situation is a mom facing when deciding whether to save the baby or let it go??
At 18-4-2010, it is the most happy day in my life. I have my baby. I went to hospital for medical check-up and yet, they told me that I'm pregnant. 2 months. But, again, the good news doesn't last longer. Because I doesn't prepare for the pregnancy, I doesn't know that I'll pregnant, I had made a largest mistakes in my life.
Before I'm pregnant, I had continuously eating this medicine -- isotretinoin. From the link here you will know more about the SERIOUS SIDE EFFECTS of this medicine. It causes miscarriage, premature birth and death of the foetus! What the hell? They don't even told me the side effects are so serious. They only told me that the side effects are dry skin and lips, fragile skin. ONLY THIS TWO EFFECTS! Should I blame them? Or blame myself? Or both of us?
And because of this medicine, I've suffer severe stomach pain when I'm pregnant. I can't sleep well during the whole period of my pregnancy. I even having period when I'm pregnant! The doctor tell me that the baby wouldn't be as healthy as other babies when she/he born. And this may cause mental problems of the baby. I want the baby. I really think that want to work and born the baby. But, this fucking isotretinoin had killed my baby. I was struggling all the time when I knew all this.
20-4-2010, it's a day that I'll never ever forget about it. I had abortion in a hospital. (For those who want to critics me, go ahead. I don't mind!) Waking up early in the morning, feeling extremely down, head faint, vomiting,etc. When I was waiting in the room, I really wanna run out of this. I feel guilty. Another woman just told me to be calm and wait. She said: Girl, no matter how you situation is, since you've made your decision, you have to do it. Everything will be fine after this. (But I'm here to say that I'm not fine, even it's already happened a year ago.) Then, I went to the surgery room, and I saw the machine. There is a tanker inside the machine to keep all those blood. It was scary! And the doctor help me to inject some kind of narcotic/drugs.
When I wake up I only felt serious pain on my belly. And yet I know I had lost my baby. I just cry at bed. Cry and cry and cry. For the following weeks and months I'm suffering from the effects of abortion. Easily fainted, pale, feeling uncomfortable without any reasons, sadness, stress, grief, guilty, etc etc.
Most of my friends advice me not to tell others about this as some of the people are close-minded and will critics me badly. After a long time of consideration, I decided to admit bravely if someone ask me whether I pregnant before or abort before. I feel that it is unfair to my baby if I deny his/her existence. It's my fault, not her/his fault. I won't forget about the day. I won't forget about you, how you make me feel when you was inside my body. Forever and ever.
Before I'm pregnant, I had continuously eating this medicine -- isotretinoin. From the link here you will know more about the SERIOUS SIDE EFFECTS of this medicine. It causes miscarriage, premature birth and death of the foetus! What the hell? They don't even told me the side effects are so serious. They only told me that the side effects are dry skin and lips, fragile skin. ONLY THIS TWO EFFECTS! Should I blame them? Or blame myself? Or both of us?
And because of this medicine, I've suffer severe stomach pain when I'm pregnant. I can't sleep well during the whole period of my pregnancy. I even having period when I'm pregnant! The doctor tell me that the baby wouldn't be as healthy as other babies when she/he born. And this may cause mental problems of the baby. I want the baby. I really think that want to work and born the baby. But, this fucking isotretinoin had killed my baby. I was struggling all the time when I knew all this.
20-4-2010, it's a day that I'll never ever forget about it. I had abortion in a hospital. (For those who want to critics me, go ahead. I don't mind!) Waking up early in the morning, feeling extremely down, head faint, vomiting,etc. When I was waiting in the room, I really wanna run out of this. I feel guilty. Another woman just told me to be calm and wait. She said: Girl, no matter how you situation is, since you've made your decision, you have to do it. Everything will be fine after this. (But I'm here to say that I'm not fine, even it's already happened a year ago.) Then, I went to the surgery room, and I saw the machine. There is a tanker inside the machine to keep all those blood. It was scary! And the doctor help me to inject some kind of narcotic/drugs.
When I wake up I only felt serious pain on my belly. And yet I know I had lost my baby. I just cry at bed. Cry and cry and cry. For the following weeks and months I'm suffering from the effects of abortion. Easily fainted, pale, feeling uncomfortable without any reasons, sadness, stress, grief, guilty, etc etc.
Most of my friends advice me not to tell others about this as some of the people are close-minded and will critics me badly. After a long time of consideration, I decided to admit bravely if someone ask me whether I pregnant before or abort before. I feel that it is unfair to my baby if I deny his/her existence. It's my fault, not her/his fault. I won't forget about the day. I won't forget about you, how you make me feel when you was inside my body. Forever and ever.
Monday, April 11, 2011
I want buddies!
Deep inside my heart. I hope I can have buddies to share with. Laugh together, play together, study together, sad together, get crazy together. However, it is IMPOSSIBLE for me. I can't tell anybody about my love problems, family problems, financial problems. I'm super duper suffer-ing!
In class, it seem like no one can be alone and someone will give you a helping hand when you need them. I agree with what Cherrie said. You need to join a 'gang' . If not they will just leave you and ignored about you. Why did such a norm appeared? Sometimes, I really feel like want to be alone, not because I don't want to join you guys, just that you let me alone for a while, then I'll be much more better. I'm same with other people, I also hope to have buddies, best friends. But, I don't know why I can't. Is't my problem? Or my appearance let you guys feel that I'm strong enough, doesn't need any care?
Actually I want to have a buddy like Cherrie, can go shopping, studying, play, chit-chat..... But, i know, again, is a norm, if I too close with Cherrie, I think someone will hate me. Since Elie leave Tarc, I've becoming emo and emo and emo. :(
I really don't know what to do already. Confused, stressed......
Sunday, April 10, 2011
Letter that would never be sent...
I've sick for a few days. And in this few days I start to realise something. I think is my fault, is because of my attitude, my temper, that make things worse. I know that u love me and care me, but sometimes I really can't feel your care. What do you think a patient need? care? or medicine? or your pocket? Within these, you had choose to care about me. But your caring isn't the type that I want. All I want when I was sick is just that u stay beside me, prepare food and medicine. For you, you always call me to eat Panadol only. You wouldn't take it seriously. Even I'm fever, you also will tell me that it just a small case, no need to visit doctor. I really upset. I really feel like want to leave you forever and ever in yesterday's morning when you are sleeping. I'm very disappointed, hurt and sad. When you are sleeping, do u know I almost fainted because of fever. Even the doctor say I fever till 39 degree Celcius you also seem like no feeling, it's normal temperature.
And, I don't know whether you realise or not, the way that we communicate gradually change. Ya, maybe you are right, I should not always 'lao gai' , but why don't you try to think about the reason that make me 'lao gai'? I am a bad temper person. I told you at first. Do you remember what you answer me? You said: Never mind. U don't care.U won't leave me. But now, ...? I know, I can't blame it on you. Is my fault.
As time passes, our relationship are getting worse and worse. I know you fell bored to care me and make me laugh when I angry already. However, it seen like a norm already. Even sometimes I'm not 'lao gai' , not angry, you also say that I'm like that. Last time you will 'tam' me. Now you will 'scold' me. Isn't our relationship just can stand 5 months only? I don't know. I really don't know. Now, you wouldn't tell me where had you went today or yesterday. You seem like don't want to tell me, or you think no need to tell me?
I'm waiting for the day. I know I will be very sad. I don't know whether my Melancholia will out burst again or not? But I know, I'm preparing myself for the day.
And, I don't know whether you realise or not, the way that we communicate gradually change. Ya, maybe you are right, I should not always 'lao gai' , but why don't you try to think about the reason that make me 'lao gai'? I am a bad temper person. I told you at first. Do you remember what you answer me? You said: Never mind. U don't care.U won't leave me. But now, ...? I know, I can't blame it on you. Is my fault.
As time passes, our relationship are getting worse and worse. I know you fell bored to care me and make me laugh when I angry already. However, it seen like a norm already. Even sometimes I'm not 'lao gai' , not angry, you also say that I'm like that. Last time you will 'tam' me. Now you will 'scold' me. Isn't our relationship just can stand 5 months only? I don't know. I really don't know. Now, you wouldn't tell me where had you went today or yesterday. You seem like don't want to tell me, or you think no need to tell me?
I'm waiting for the day. I know I will be very sad. I don't know whether my Melancholia will out burst again or not? But I know, I'm preparing myself for the day.
Monday, March 21, 2011
Love This Song !
I've fall in love to this song ---What You Waiting For, for such a long time ago. I remember I was in G6, The Gardens when I first listen to this song. Love it! This song makes me want to dance.>.<'''
okay. Here we go ~~ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥
Thursday, March 17, 2011
Countdown - 5 days!
I'm on the process of preparing for my mid-course examination. Our mid-course start at 23th March until 31st March. Then the AS is coming on 9th May. Oh gosh, is like only one month for us to prepare. *stress* @_@
Seriously, I'm study hard for this exam. Because I knew that I've no time to play and fool around already. Two of my friends have been to Australia for their studies. I'm shock when I knew both of them targeted at medicine. I think it's time for me to decide where to go and what courses to take. And one of my friend is taking A-Level at KYUEM. OMG! I just knew it. Yeaa, I'm kinda blur.
I've planning to go Singapore with Kim Leong for such a long time ago. However, I need more info about the courses and universities. So we've decided to collect info and discuss about it after exam. [waiting for the day]
I want to be SUCCESS !
Work hard,
Ting.
Seriously, I'm study hard for this exam. Because I knew that I've no time to play and fool around already. Two of my friends have been to Australia for their studies. I'm shock when I knew both of them targeted at medicine. I think it's time for me to decide where to go and what courses to take. And one of my friend is taking A-Level at KYUEM. OMG! I just knew it. Yeaa, I'm kinda blur.
I've planning to go Singapore with Kim Leong for such a long time ago. However, I need more info about the courses and universities. So we've decided to collect info and discuss about it after exam. [waiting for the day]
I want to be SUCCESS !
Work hard,
Ting.
Monday, March 14, 2011
The Band Perry - If I Die Young
Currently in exam-prepared mood. That's why I've abandoned my blog for almost a month.
Love this song so so much recently. Feel so touching and suit my mood. Mr. Simon, listen to this!
Love this song so so much recently. Feel so touching and suit my mood. Mr. Simon, listen to this!
' If i die young, bury me in satin
Lay me down on a bed of roses
Sink me in the river at dawn
Send me away with the words of a love song ...'
Sunday, January 30, 2011
I'm FATTY GAL
Raining from morning till now. Can't go anywhere, so I decided to write blog....XD
Still got 3 days is OUR CNY d.So yesterday my dear and me send ZOE to eugene's house for grooming.After that went shopping with my dear at 1U. Damn admire others when shopping. They can shop whatever they want, eat whatever they want.RICH is the best.....!! Nvm, forget about it.
However, we have a unforgettable and happee dinner together at SHOGUN. Miss da momentz. =)
Love to eat nice, tasty and great food.XD...Thanks to my dear bring me go eat.
As CNY is around the corner, I hope to have a happy and crazy CNY.. >.<... i'm sot i know..
Hope to get all this stuffs after CNY :
Although I hope to get Iphone 5, but I'm not that greedy. Give me an iphone4 i already 'like a G6'-- feeling so high!!!
I love COACH!!! *bling bling eyes*
By the way, I love the NEW COACH 'HEARTS POPPY GLAM TOTE' much more than this... >.<
Why am i so GREEDY??!!
Will be very very happy if i get this two...
Anyway, girls and guys, lets have a PROSPEROUS CHINESE NEW YEAR!!
[ GIFTS]
Friday, January 28, 2011
MARRIAGE PROPOSAL!
Many things happen in this few days... gonna burst out. @_@ my bf, my studies , and, of course, is ---> MONEY!! Seriously, i hate the feeling of being POOR. I'm want to be richhhhhhhhh !!! So, Simon Yong ,pls work hard.thanks !
Since this is a new semester. I'm trying to study harder compare with last sem. I know I'mvery extremely lazy in last sem. However, me myself feel that I've improve much in this semester. XD
I hope I can achieve whatever I want in the future. =)
Hmmm... Last time I always think to marry after I graduate. But, someone just propose to me. I've never been thinking of this at this moment. I know, many of my friends had married between age 18 and 21. But, I'm sad to tell you that I'll marry with you, but NOT NOW. Sorry, dear.
..
Since this is a new semester. I'm trying to study harder compare with last sem. I know I'm
I hope I can achieve whatever I want in the future. =)
Hmmm... Last time I always think to marry after I graduate. But, someone just propose to me. I've never been thinking of this at this moment. I know, many of my friends had married between age 18 and 21. But, I'm sad to tell you that I'll marry with you, but NOT NOW. Sorry, dear.
..
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